without the joy

what was it like for you
to leave me the way that you did

all the intrusion
invasion withdrawn
leaving your body finally freed
without the joy of knowing so
at least while still its little boy

what is it like for you
to see me the way that you can
minimize the temporal
brush up against my hand
without the joy of knowing so
at least while still a little boy

what will it be like for you
when we’re on the same side
my heaven’s deconstructed
undefined

and I am uncertain each be recognized
without the joy of knowing so
at least while still my little boy

-e

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